It has been a week since I left NYC for Upstate NY. I initially thought I would be picking up shifts at a few stores here in town, but so far, that has not happened. So, for this past week I have had a lot of time to myself. I live by myself in a huge apartment (by NYC standards anyway) and I don’t have a car here so I rely on my sister or father. Every morning I wake up, take my time getting ready, spend quiet time with God – praying and singing worship songs. It has been awesome.
A few posts back I talked about how I had done a lot for my stomach. Since then I have tried to do a lot for other things. My soul especially. I don’t know when it happened exactly, but I have stopped over-eating, I am eating healthier food and eating much less sugar.
I think I traded feeling full in my belly with feeling full in my spirit. Since finding out that I would be leaving for five weeks, I decided to try and spend as much time with the people I love most. Which, in the city, means friends, since I don’t have family there. When I spent more time on my relationships with others my relationship with myself grew. Seems a bit strange, but it totally makes sense to me now. When I spent more time in fellowship with others, I spent more time in fellowship with God and ultimately relinquishing control to God. It is actually quite freeing to not be in control. To let my creator have control again. He will always have my best interest at heart. He will never fail me. I will fail me. Other people will fail me. But, He, He will always have me.
I’m learning to love boldly. It’s still a struggle sometimes but, it sure is a wonderful journey. I am learning to love and honor my friends, and especially my family, BOLDLY, to ask for help BOLDLY, to face my fears BOLDLY, to go for what I want BOLDLY, and to let God take control BOLDLY.
Oh, goodness, that makes me excited. I just want to keep living boldly so that I keep my spirit alive and full.
More than ever, on this beautiful Resurrection Day, I hope you Enjoy Life.